The Victim, Judge, and Champion

By Jim Fannin

The Road of Life has hills, flat four-lane highways, hairpin curves, mountainous terrain, dead-end streets, and maybe a detour or three. Some parts of the road are crowded, and some desolate. Everyone has a vehicle. 

You inherited your ride when you were born. Some drive a Ferrari. Others a Mini-Cooper. We are all different. You can enhance your car at any time. However, the frame, basic size, and weight? It is what it is. You get to choose the route, any route. You can alter it at a moment’s notice. You choose the speed. You can stop wherever and whenever. Some turns lead to success. Others may find you lost. There are a few rules on the Road of Life. There is, however, one absolute. With free will, you can be in control of the journey and the ultimate destination. Or choose not to.

Everyone has three drivers in their vehicle. Only one can drive at any given time. 

The first one you know well. This is the JUDGE. When the judge gets behind the wheel, they look everywhere but the road. They are sarcastic to the other drivers. Judge the color, make, and model of all of the other cars, trucks, and buses. They gossip. They spread rumors. They judge anybody and everybody. It’s never their fault. Circumstances, conditions, and situations are all because of other people. Efficient driving is not their thing. They speed and tailgate; they can be reckless. They get lost. “Always judging” is their motto. Even the authorities are judged on how they manage the traffic and the roads.

When the next driver takes the wheel on the Road of Life, they drive like a blue-haired senior citizen where you can only see their hands on the wheel. Clear the road when the VICTIM is managing the brake and gas pedals. Driving is erratic. There is tension at the wheel. This person feels like everyone is out to get them. This is the VICTIM. When the VICTIM drives, their tardiness is blamed on the conditions, circumstances or situations they encounter. “Poor me” is the battle cry of the VICTIM. The road is too curvy, slick or icy. The weather is too windy, cold, or foggy. The VICTIM can be an angry driver. The VICTIM misses opportunities. The VICTIM seldom experiences beautiful scenery. In fact, most VICTIMS aren’t even clear on where they’re going.

It’s when the third driver sits at the helm that the ride becomes smooth and efficient. The journey is fun, exciting, and eventful. This is the CHAMPION. The first thing the CHAMPION does is input GPS coordinates to obtain the most efficient route to their destination. They check the tires for ample air and check the fuel gauge for a full tank of gas. The rearview mirror gets taken down because there is no going in reverse. Ever. Hands are always on the wheel. Eyes fixed on the road. The CHAMPION never seems to rush or hurry. They make time to check out the scenery along the way. They know where they’re going and precisely how and when they’ll arrive. Most importantly, the CHAMPION knows the journey is what it’s all about.

Suddenly and without warning, a huge log falls off a truck onto the road a few hundred yards in front of your car. The pathway is blocked. The JUDGE is driving. They blame the truck driver for his carelessness. They blame the highway patrol for not being on the scene. “You’re an idiot,” they bellow. “What are you looking at?” they scream to a rubbernecking passerby.

The VICTIM driving onto this scene immediately feels despair. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” they scream at no one in particular. Decisions are slow. Their thought process is cumbersome. Imagination and creativity are lacking. A feeling of insecurity overcomes the VICTIM. “I’m going to be late. I’ll get fired.” “This is so unfair. Why me?” “I always seem to encounter problems like this.” “If I didn’t have any bad luck, I’d have no luck at all.”

However, the CHAMPION is the poster child for being cool in adverse situations. Driving their car, they calmly stop near the log, looking around to assess the situation. Nobody is injured. “That’s good,” thinks the CHAMPION, who thoughtfully asks the driver if they’re okay. The CHAMPION is seeking solutions to the challenge. “Hmmm…maybe the trucker and I can move the log.” “Maybe I can slowly drive over it.” “I know. I’ll go around it.” Then they casually return to their car and plot out a detour. “Next” is the battle cry of the CHAMPION. 

The Road of Life has many unforeseen challenges. Floor it when the road is straight and clear under optimal conditions. Hug the curves for efficiency and safety. Slow down in the mountains. Obey road signs. Watch your speed. And don’t forget to rest along the way. Here you can take in the scenery. Now you may fully engage in the moment as long as you desire. The Road of Life is in no hurry. It is merely the drivers who are frantic and impatient.

You need to ask yourself, “Who’s driving my car?” Is it the VICTIM, the JUDGE, or the CHAMPION?

Have a safe and prosperous journey!